Friday, October 28, 2005

"It's not that I feel old, it's just that this is the oldest I've ever been."
- Pete Seeger

A little over a week from now, I'm turning (to use Christie's phrase) "halfway to seventy", and all in all I'm okay with it. Something I used to think I'd have done by now are still left undone and things I'd hoped I'd be done with are still with me and likely always will be, but my life is full of wonderful surprises that I never would have thought could be mine, and I still feel, to steal one of my father's phrases (too old for original thought, I guess) that "every day is a net gain."

That being said, I'm not feeling very happy with my body right now. Yesterday morning, I tweaked my back putting on my shoes in exactly the same place that always hurts after a long day of canoeing, or when I've slept on the ground, and today it still hurts there, not again, but still, and it's actually getting worse, which sucks because my plans for the weekend involved not only two long days of canoeing, which is the best way in the world to see the fall colors in the ozarks, but also some sleeping on the ground, and I know that if I start out the weekend already hurt, I'm just doing to make myself worse, and come Sunday evening, I'd be in a body cast, and Christie would have to drag me up the stairs and prop me up in front of the TV so I could watch Extreme Makeover Home Edition, only this time I'd be thinking about whether Paul could come over and widen all our doors so that I could fit through them in my new body cast.

Except that Christie's sick, which means she wouldn't have the energy to drag me up the stairs, so no canoeing trip this weekend. And suddenly, I'm feeling like a seven-year-old stuck in the body of a fifty-year-old, and I want to whine about the unfairness of it all and throw myself around and stamp my foot, except I'm sort of afraid I'd hurt myself in the process.

Also, I went to the dentist yesterday and it was one of those, "Well, at your age..." kind of experience. I spent my whole youth worrying about a receding hairline, and now they tell me I have a receding gumline, which I didn't even know was on the menu. I feel very unprepared for getting older.

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